Dealing with stealing

Following on from the incident I had to deal with “Louise” and her collection of our things.

We had a family meeting, but she wouldn’t talk while “Thelma” and MM in the room, so we had a little chat, just the two of us.
We talked about why she took the clothes. She started by telling me she thought that they were hers. That it was hers from the department. So we looked at the clothes and I asked did she really think the department would give her three pairs of bathers, in the middle of winter? Would they really give her a fairy dress-up dress? She was good, she said no.

When we got a bit further into our chat she said she missed her things. That she didn’t have time to pack and she wanted more clothes. Poor baby.

So, we talked about how what she’d done might make me feel.
She said angry first, so I asked, do I sound angry? Do I look angry? No.
So, how do I look? Sad. You look sad.
Yes, I’m sad that you don’t have your things and you think it’s ok to take my things.
I’m sad that you didn’t ask me for some more clothes.

We got out all her clothes in her emergency bag from the department and laid them all out on the floor so she could see that there were quite a few things there. I then asked if there was anything she wanted to ask me. She thought for a second and then asked if she could have some more clothes.
We went through everything she had packed from our cupboard, and she tried everything on, well, what she could get on. It turned out there were only three things in the whole pile that actually were her size, so she got to keep those.

I hope we did the right thing.
What are your thoughts?
What would you have said or done differently?


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