The birth family just get stranger.
In curiouser and curiouser I mentioned that the birth family of little “Jade” have had nothing to do with her for 3 months. Now, they’ve made contact with the new social worker and all hell has broken out.
Grandma asked on Tuesday for “Jade” to spend 7 hours with them on Easter Saturday, with us being required to drive her an hour to and from this visit, and because “Jade” hasn’t seen them since before Christmas I really needed to stay local to pop back should she need me. What would I going to do for 7 hours?!
But it doesn’t stop there, Grandma wants to see “Jade” every other weekend, again, she expects us to drive her down there. What the…?!
So, I spoke with “Jades” new social worker. I think I’m going to like working with her, she is very child focussed, and was really happy to support me when I said that it was not convenient for us to take “Jade” down on Easter Saturday, but we could reschedule. She also supported me when I said 7 hours is ridiculous, but, perhaps we could go watch a movie while “Jade” is with the family, so 2 hours would be the maximum.
I spoke with my new support worker and she as displeased as us about this. So, as a result I’ve done more thinking and the more thinking I do, the less comfortable I am with this situation.
I asked if other people would be there, or just grandma. Answer, Aunty, her pile of children and possibly other relatives. How is this a good situation for “Jade”? Too many people. Too many strangers and no us there to support her.
“Jade’s” social worker emailed me about the suggestion I put forward and grandma wants to do it next weekend, she’s being quite pushy and not offering to do any travelling herself to make this happen. And, to make it worse has threatened to lodge a formal complaint if she doesn’t get what she wants.
Why is it now, they want contact, and why so much?
They haven’t seen “Jade” since before Christmas. They never confirmed the January date I put forward, in February they asked 3 days before they wanted contact but we were going on holiday, there was no request for March and now, they want fortnightly contact?
Don’t get me wrong, if “Jade” is going to reunify with her TM (tummy mummy) then I would support her having access with her extended family as they will be a big part of her life in the future. But, access visits have been cut back to 2 visits a week for 90 minutes each. From 5 days a week (total of 8.5 hours) to 3 hours a week, things aren’t looking good.
Ever the sceptic, MM suggests that they smell blood in the water. We know that reunification isn’t going well and that in a couple of months some serious decisions will be made about “Jade” and her brother. Is there plan to make contact, and apply for guardianship? Did they not do that when “Jade” first went into care? Were they turned down then and somehow think that by making an effort now it will change the departments mind? How is it making an effort if all they do is demand I drive baby across town or they’ll put in a complaint? So many questions and no answers….yet. I feel a long few weeks coming up.