How do you know when enough is enough?

The dilema so many families face.

How do you know when you have enough children?

Did you always know how many children you wanted?

What is that moment that makes you say,  “yep, all done, no more children”?

As I pack away little Tyla’s size 1 clothes, I wonder will there be another little girl to wear them or is it time to pack them up and donate them to another family?

I’m not sure that I want another long term placement, but what about emergency placements? Or short term?

While I would like to take in more children in the future, we have to think of Bonnie and Tyla first. How will they cope with other children coming and going? Are they old enough to understand?

Then there’s sleep. I mean, Tyla is finally sleeping through the night. Do I really want to go back to night time feedings?

MM is amazing. He just reminds me that I will be doing most of the work as he will be working and he really doesnt hear the babies in the night. He hasn’t said enough is enough. He did get me a bigger car. I take that as a yes vote for more babies.

We recently watched Dumbo, something I had never seen as a child, and later Bonnie was playing and told me that this little fella (her toy) had lost his mummy. So the conversation we had was about us looking after him until we could find him a new mummy. She thought that was a good idea. So, I continued on with telling her that sometimes little babies lose their mummies, and maybe we could look after them until we find them a new mummy too. She asked if it would be a boy or a girl baby, because she would like a boy baby.

So, we’ve started chatting with the girls about the prospect of maybe looking after a baby, and with the school holidays coming up, I’m thinking it might be a good time to take a short placement, just for the holidays, to see how we all cope.

How will little Tyla go with being promoted from family baby to big sister and middle child? She LOVES babies. We cant go anywhere without her finding a baby to smile at and wave to, and if one should cry she will tell you they need food. But thats very different from living with a little tiny person.

How will Bonnie go with two little siblings?

Now the girls are in big girl beds we have not one but two empty cots in our room. Looking at me.

Looking empty.

Looking very empty.

Is it time?




I couldn’t do that

For all the people (both friends and strangers) who have ever told me “I couldn’t do that, I’d get too attached”
I’m not sure quite what you mean.
I don’t know if you mean I’m a cold hearted ogre that doesn’t cry EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. a child leaves our home.
I don’t know if you mean I have a super inner strength to cry my eyes out and then say yes to another child and know that I’m going to go through it all again.
I don’t know quite what you mean.
But what I can tell you is I do get attached.

I owe it to these precious children that come into our home to get attached and love them like they are my own because someone has to and ok, it’s not easy knowing I’m in for more tears, but, the day I don’t care enough to get attached, is the day I have to give fostering away.
These children need to be cared for and loved.
We’re not super strong, cold hearted or amazing.
We’re just giving some precious little people what they need when they need it most.